Lvrgrl’s Weblog

Trimming the Fat
March 17, 2009, 6:35 pm
Filed under: internets | Tags:

What if, dear friend, your profile disappeared tomorrow? What of all your pithy comments <audience gasps> and carefully tagged photos <eyebrows raise>. Or even, everything you’ve ever put on the internet since 1989, up in smoke Overnight!

What if you even had a heads up: twenty four hours, but still no god given way to pack it all up and take it with you. It would fit in a small suitcase, to be sure, but the trouble is finding it all! And keeping it all in tact with the delicate connections you saw fit to form.

You see my point compadre, there’s more to worry about these days than stolen rights to the prolific content right here in front our very eyes. No, no, don’t do it, don’t jump! The threat is false but the fear is real: do you know where you’ll be when facebook ends?

anyways, call me.


Memory Who?
March 13, 2009, 11:42 am
Filed under: music | Tags:

The Stereo Memory Man with Hazarai is the pedal for today’s rocker.

The basic gist of a loop pedal is you play a small tidbit of music into the box and it will grab the sample and play it over and over again for all eternity.  What’s more, you can layer these loops on top of one another for a cacophonous effect.  This method is used by many a solo artist, like the recent Andrew Bird, to create the appearance of friends.

But the M squared is not just your run of the mill looper.  Nor is it a practical one, like the multiple phased Boss looping station used by Owen Pallett of Arcade Fire / Final Fantasy or the USB inputable Digitech Jam Man, even better than the station for a mere $20 more.  And sure, you could get the single nail polish red Boss pedal to add to your collection of colored things that look the same but better as you add more of them, but we’re models of conservation these days, right?

No, this Electro-harmonix jobby is not a piece of beginner’s gear, but then you don’t make beginner sounding music now do you. The looping function is paired with blend, decay, filter, reflect and delay controls.  This means a few things: one is you can click just the right hand bypass button and use these effects without looping or you can click the left hand button to loop and add the above effects to any sample – even after you’ve recorded it.  But most importantly the additional controls mean that the sound is immediately textured and forever pliable so you’ll be making noise out of music in no time.

The Hazarai doesn’t refer to the 70’s party pattern, but it’s eight different programmable modes, the true bells and whistles of this little guy.  Each of these modes, in combo with the controls above, allow you to create different settings for the repeated parts of your loops.  For instance you can make your bit of music start off soft and then grow louder and louder, like a rushing wave, each time it repeats. This happens automatic like and without turning a knob slowly in real time to get the effect if you catch my drift.

The stereo feature only works to create a ping pong effect between the two speakers if you actually have two separate outputs.  If you are just using one cable to one amp the whole stereo idea null and void.  The tap tempo is supposed to be critical for live performance but I wouldn’t know about that part since this thing has yet to see the light outside the basement.

Some actual down sides, just to be upfront:
There’s only one, yes one, input.  So if you want to layer say your vocals over your guitar you need some more gear, like maybe a switch pedal.  Also, unlike almost every other pedal in existence you have to actually HOLD DOWN the button with your foot while recording, which means you have to wear shoes.  This prevents you from tweaking the knobs with your toes and you are not likely to hold shows in galleries anytime soon.

You can find it at Main Drag Music real easy since it’s the only looper they carry.  Ask for Teddy: a moppy dark haired man who knows a lot about synths. You can use their private rooms to try it out with a Moog keyboard that practically plays itself.  If you find that the first line your record gets quieter when you record and play the next layer of the loop, it’s not a drawback of the device.  Just make sure the repeat knob is set to less than full and you’ll get equal levels for everything you record, if that’s what you are going for!

March 11, 2009, 3:23 pm
Filed under: movies | Tags:


Coraline, the movie, is a story about an eleven year old girl just moved into a big pink mansion on a hill.

Through the portal of dreams she discovers a tunnel that takes her to a parallel universe, one that had been locked away and hidden for years.  The new world is enticing, but dangerous; ruled by another mother who provides perfection in exchange for entrapping love.  When mom no. 2 doesn’t get what she wants she morphs into a black widow spider who likes to play games to win her way.

Coraline’s boy friend, Wybourn, calls her crazy when she discloses her fear.  Later, Why Born, or Why Be for short, gets schooled by his grandmother and he rushes to Coraline’s rescue.  Together they cast the bad mom down a well of so dark she’s sure never to surface again.

Classic Freud: straight up, no twist.  The other mother, as anyone who’s been to post feminist lacanian psychoanalysis will know, is not an ACTUAL mother, but the mother INSIDE of you.  The house is your body and the unexplored rooms your sexuality.  The knight in shining armor, well we know that one is a myth.

Were it not for the prominent appearance of talking flowers and black cats throughout my childhood dreams, I’d throw the whole thing out with tomorrow’s garbage myself.

March 10, 2009, 1:04 pm
Filed under: politics | Tags: ,

Conde Nasty launches a publicity mechanism in the wake of Domino’s fall. The yawn worthy cover inspires the blogsphere to shout, “yes, all women r naked too.” The media weighs in with lavish commentary and significant skepticism:

Media Bistro calls the cover a misstep noting that the fat girl thing has been done before in like 2007 and it didn’t work then.

The Telegraph tells us the cover holds all 210 pounds of her (so that’s like two Kate Mosses for the price of one).

The Herald Tribune sees Love as a “title for ‘imperfect’ times.”

And even Hipster Runoff says: “I’d do her.”

Editor Katy Grand adds poetry to the affair, reminding us to wake up each morning with a “truckload” of confidence.

A heavily anticipated follow up cover will appear six months from now featuring Marilyn Manson nude save a tutu.

Better news at The Gossip.

An Anti-friend
February 26, 2009, 9:16 pm
Filed under: internets, words


I felt interaged about this little piece of news until I scaled down the wall to twenty-five things that serve this man right:


WFD – or what’s for Dinners,
February 9, 2009, 7:08 pm
Filed under: eats | Tags: ,


Here’s a little game we call WFD, or what’s for dinner.
Some may say that mussels are a bit fancy for a night at home.
I say they are super easy to cook and oh so tasty.

Here’s what you do:
1. Pick up two pounds of mussels for two people from the Lobster Place at $3.25 a pound. You can get them cheaper in Chinatown, but you’ll find smaller bodies and broken shells among the heap.

2. Rinse under cool running water for 30 minutes. Gently pick through, trashing any opened or cracked ones. Pull off any stringy stuff from the outside of the sealed black gems and set aside.

3. Heat up some oil in a big pot.

4. Throw in a few cloves of smashed up garlic and half an onion, chopped up.

5. Once this is all soft dump in 1/2 cup of white wine and a little splash of water, along with the rinsed and washed mussels.

6. Cover and steam until the mussel shells open up, shaking the whole bowl up every so often.

7. Eat ’em, except for any stubborn ones that stayed shut tight.

Here we also made fries in the toaster oven: thinly sliced potatoes brushed with oil and baked for a bit until browned then sprinkled with rosemary. Plus we steamed up a bunch of asparagus with a little salt and pepper. Voilla.

rar rar like a dungeon dragon
February 5, 2009, 4:40 pm
Filed under: art | Tags: , ,


Antonia lived in a big bright house that overlooked the bay. You could see this house from the opposite side of the water, looming over the wide green lawn and stretched across it – a forced break in the trees and ostentatiously large. Situated at the end of Cemetery Lane and set off from the road by a dirt driveway that cracked under your car tires when you drove up, the house stood, on all accounts, separate from the rest. The road itself did in fact harbor a cemetery at its crook – a deep bend in the pavement lined with a wooden fence mostly left open to visitors. Not that we visited.

Once inside, the place always felt eerily empty, whether or not anyone was home. Occasionally a dad would appear, grumpy from work, whiskey in hand, or a mom would pop out of the kitchen trying to appear cheerful but escaping after a quick hello. But mostly it was just Tony and me, stealing small snips of red wine from the kitchen while reading on the fridge about the prudish Americans who feared a glass a day during pregnancy.

Like most things in Antonia’s house, the piano – placed fat and comfortable in the middle of the white wide room – was untouched. Never heard the thing get played, not even once; a large sprawling animal kept silent and held still, surrounded by a vast space of intimidation.

And this is the exact image I found on accident in the heart of Chelsea’s normally crap art district, a strip of streets I return to at least once a month – free red wine or not. Just in the doors of the Gladstone Gallery sat a baby grand, proof that there are others out there guilty of over romanticizing a big hunk o’ metal strings, padded hammers in a glossy black surface.

But that anyone would go a step further to not only carve a hole in the thing so one can smash at the keys from the inside out but then also then to set it on wheels so one can lug it about the room like it belongs to you, like it’s a part of your own body – now that is to be consumed by music.

Allora & Calzadilla
“Stop, Repair, Prepare”
through Feb 21st.

Owlie Hour Update:
The first and only winner of last week’s contest is one awahl who guessed correctly that the red block is the one that goes ‘DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA’! For reference, posting songs on a wordpress blog is wikkid easy:

First host your mp3 somewhere (that’s one thing WP won’t do for you). I put mine on my public folder on my mobile me.

Once the mp3 has a home somewhere on the www, just include this – audio – in the html of your post and WP will make a pretty little player in a heartbeat. You need to put [ and ] around the audio tag too.